Clearly, a line has been drawn between what is meant for children and what is meant for adults. When a child tries to cross over, though, it just comes across as cute.
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Exploring this foggy zone, I will be looking for answers on how we can bring together adult and child. Before I go any further though, I would like to clarify what I mean by the words child and adult. This is how the dictionary defines a child:. The dictionary defines an adult as:. I find these definitions a bit vague. I understand the physical part of being fully grown, but can we ever be fully developed mentally? Before I started thinking hard about all of this, I thought of the child and adult as two completely separate things. I was an unknowing believer in the line between what is meant for children and what is meant for adults.
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Here, I made a chart:. This is not a definitive or complete chart. Uniting imagination with reality, and combining play with work. Get ready to love each other. We pop out into the world, and see all the things going on and try to figure them out!
As we grow older, it feels like there is less and less to discover. The skill required to use a pen eventually becomes automatic. I mean, imagine if every single time we used a pen it was like we were discovering it for the first time. We would literally never be able to get anything done!
It saves energy to be automatic, especially about things that are going to be repeated over and over. It would be a waste of precious human energy to create a new route of perception for things we are going to do daily. But not all problems can be solved with the pre-made routes of experience. O ver time, these pre-made routes tend to become stale and mundane.
Spaceship, time machine, house, friend, fort. To see something new, we have to unlearn what we already know. This is where art comes in! In this way, art gives the sensation of things as they are truly perceived, not as they are known. Defamiliarization is all about taking the ordinary, and making it strange, in order to change our perception of it. The first time he saw Hebrew, he thought something was wrong with his eyes. That was the first time he saw a writing system other than English. So how do imaginary alphabets connect us to our childhood?
They remind us of that feeling of first discovery. As we get used to things, perception becomes a habit, instead of a new discovery each time. So it makes sense that as we get older, more and more things become familiar to us. In turn, there is less that is unfamiliar.
Why I don’t want to grow up – Hacker Noon
It has potential to make us curious, and challenges us to slow down and focus on what we are truly perceiving. Defamiliarization is essentially seeing the strangeness of the ordinary, which is a step of unlearning. Take the following example of art revealing the strangeness of the ordinary. How They Do it. First, they take the dinglebop and smooth it out with a bunch of schleem. The schleem is then repurposed for further use. They take the dinglebop and they push it through the grumbo where the fleeb is rubbed against it. As the narrator is saying this, you watch alien factory workers assemble a plumbus.
To explain this, imagine how an alien would feel viewing a video of how a household object is made. It might go something like this:. First, they heat the steel to a high temperature. Then, they shape it using an industrial hammer. Sounds a bit like how the plumbus is made, right? First, they heat the dinglebop to a high temperature. Then, they shape the dinglebop using schleem. Only those aliens know what the plumbus is for, and only humans know what scissors are for. The plumbus makes me wonder, how would it feel to be an alien landing on earth and experiencing human culture for the first time?
The aliens would land and see how humans make objects in factories, objects only we know the purpose of. It really points out how weird we are. In order to see this weird aspect of humanity though, we had to see it through a different lense than the usual one. We had to defamiliarize our perspective. Imagine if someone had tried to prove the same point, that humans create objects only we know the process and purpose of, but did it by presenting a normal video of how scissors are made. This is a plumbus my boyfriend made me as a present.
It reminds me everyday of the symbolic importance of… schleem. By avoiding the familiar names for things, we are forced to describe them in a more honest and direct way. He looks at how re-labeling, and slowing down perception can help OCD patients. Doidge explains how the part of the brain we detect mistakes with, the orbital frontal cortex, is more activated in people with OCD.
In OCD, this gearshift becomes extremely sticky. This is similar to what Shklyovsky says about slowing down perception and seeing things as they truly are. A new mental route challenging the old pre-made one! But it is not germs, it is my OCD. By relabelling the situation, it is puts into a different context, just like we saw with the plumbus! A new way of looking at the same thing. From there, we can observe and question the habits. And art exists that one may recover the sensation of life; it exists to make one feel things, to make the stone stony.
The plumbus makes us see how weird we are.
I Don't Want To Be
Maybe it really looks something more like this.. I wish it was as clear and simple as the first one I drew…but I think the process of learning and unlearning is a constant struggle and squiggle in life. Calvin, a six-year old boy who is the main character in the comic, Calvin and Hobbes by Bill Watterson.
But Calvin and Hobbes makes sense to so many people.
Even though the comic ran from —, people are still relating to it today. So I have stopped convincing myself that I am. Ready for what a relationship has to offer. Maybe I will be someday. Or maybe it just is what it is. But I know why I made bad decisions in the past. Because I insisted to myself that I was ready for the next relationship. I was just lonely. Timing in a relationship is everything. And we can convince ourselves that the timing is amazing.
But timing is predicated on so many different factors. The problem is that the need for freedom and space does not actually intersect. If I say I just want to do whatever I want, whenever I want, it tells me I am not open to considering another person as a partner. But you have to explain it. Or talk about it. Or compromise to get it. Ones who you know were just arguing. But I never want to be again. So I choose to be free. Unless you are me of course. So you tell the truth. And it can be hard. And as much as we like to say we never become a burden in a relationship.
We all have been. Because we want to feel like someone loves us. Relationships, at all stages, are full of pressure. Are we still seeing other people? When is the appropriate time to meet your kids? To go on a trip together? What about meeting your parents? To move in together? If I am being honest, sex is what drives me back to relationships a lot of the time.
I have been experimenting with the idea of celibacy for a period of time. Because sex and love are different for me. They can coincide beautifully, but still they are very different. And for each person, the differences vary. What it means is different based on the person, the context and the timing. People would actually be themselves. Instead of acting like their best self to get laid earlier. Or pretending they really want to actually Netflix and chill.
What if there were no judgments surrounding the timing of sex?